What “roots” are needed for marriage?
People often speculate about what makes a marriage: mutual respect, love, good communication and the list goes on…
Maybe we can look at the above qualities and skills as “fruit” and look deeper to find the “roots”. The important and necessary components of a good marriage are addressed by the Wisdom of the Ages speaking in the Psalms and Proverbs of the Holy Scriptures about the importance of fearing God to obtain Wisdom (Psalm 1). In Proverbs we are told that Prudence and Wisdom call to us and warn us from foolishness and brash acts. (Proverbs 22 and many others). Wisdom is often contrasted with immaturity and foolishness in this book of Proverbs in the Bible. In John 15 we are encouraged by the Lord, Jesus Christ, that we are like branches that need to develop the ability to “Abide” or remain firmly grafted into Jesus, the “Vine”. It’s a process, grafting, that allows for a branch to be surgically attached to a larger stronger limb or vine, and then the surgical site is wrapped to keep out unwanted deterrents to the process and allow for sap to begin to flow into the newly grafted branch. If we want maturity for our marriages, we need to seek the Lord in His Word (disciplined study and discipleship) and by His Spirit (prayer and communion) for His Wisdom.
We are told in another parable by Jesus (Matthew 7:24-27) that we are to be like a house that is securely set on a foundation that is firmly planted in Christ versus a house laid on a foundation of sand and thus is not stable and secure and ultimately will ruin the house. As one who wishes to be a wise spouse, I can hear the Lord saying to get Wisdom, to Fear Him and to Abide. And what will result? MATURITY! We are promised we will get the “fruit” of Abiding, of “living and moving and having our being in Him” (Acts 17:28). And what are those Fruits? Galatians 5 lays these fruit of Abiding in the Spirit out for us so beautifully:
22 & 23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
This is the substance of a good marriage, the “root” of Godly character or maturity in the spouses.